Think about it, and be honest:
Do you experience:
1. A pattern of out of control behavior.
2. Severe consequences due to sexual behavior.
3. Inability to stop despite adverse consequences.
4. Persistent pursuit of self-destructive behavior.
5. Ongoing desire or effort to limit sexual behavior.
6. Sexual obsession and fantasy as a primary coping mechanism.
7. Increasing amounts of sexual experience because the current level of activity is no longer sufficient.
8. Severe mood changes around sexual activity.
9. Inordinate amount of time spent in obtaining sex, being sexual, or recovering from sexual experience.
10. Neglect of important social, occupational, or recreational activities because of sexual behavior.
(Carnes, Patrick Don’t Call it Love. New York: Bantam, 1991)
• Do you pursue pornography for sexual arousal and release? In the light of brain chemistry that we discussed, it is safe to say, that any intentional viewing and pursuit of pornography is an issue that can have serious consequences.
• Has your habit increased? How has the habit or frequency changed over time? Remember, addiction happens in a progression. What will happen if the present trend continues?
• Have you tried to stop? If you’ve tried to stop, but are unable, you are dealing with an addiction. This is especially true, if there has been some adverse consequences (embarrassment, humiliation) and you still couldn’t stop.
• Does what you used to look at not satisfy? If you find yourself wanting to look at more graphic images, you are moving into the desensitization stage. Remember the roller coaster. Where will this lead?
• Do you lie about your use? If you do, you’re probably trying to convince yourself that you don’t have a problem. The reality is you probably do.
• Another important step to start thinking about is why. Why do you look at porn? What do you get out of it? Comfort? A high? Stress relief? What are you conditioning your brain to?